Just a goatman trying to escape his past, bounty hunters, priests offering salvation and insurance people bothering him about his cart's extended warranty.

Goatman Thief/Fighter, Level 7/7 Apprentice Wizard

Ability Scores

STR 18 Hit Prob:+1; Dmg Adj:+2; Wgt Allow:110; Max Press:255; Op Drs:11; BB/LG:16
DEX 18 Retn adj:+2; Missile Att Adj:+2; Def Adj:-4
CON 9 HP Adj:0; Sys Shk:65%; Res Sur:70%; Pois Save:0; Regen:Nil
INT 9 NWP:+2; Spell Lvl:4th; Lrn Sp: 35%; Spells/Lvl:6; Illu Immunity:-
WIS 8 Mag Def Adj:0; Bonus Spells:0; Spell Fail:25%; Spell Immunity:-
CHA 5 Max No Hench:2; Loy Base:-4; Retn Adj:-3


Unencumbered (0-110) 12
Light (111-149) 8
Moderate (150-188) 6
Heavy (189-227) 4
Severe (227-255) 1

Saving Throws

Paralyzation, Poison, Death Magic : 10
Rod, Staff or Wand : 12
Petrification or Polymorph : 11
Breath Weapon : 12
Spell : 13

Combat Things

Roll 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19
AC hit 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 -1 -2 -3 -4 -5 -6 -7
AC : 1 (Natural 6, -4 dex, -1 bracers)
HP : 63/63
Two-handed sword : size L, damage type S, damage roll vs S/M: 1d10+4, vs L : 3d6+4, speed : 7
Penalties in case of two-weapon attack negated from mastery and dexterity.
3 attacks per 2 turn with a two-handed sword (1 attack in first round, 2 attack in second, repeat)
+1 attack per round with off-hand (If attacking with two.)
3 attacks per 2 turns with Fighter lvl 7
So 3 attacks per round at all times, with two two-handed swords.
Darts : speed 2, 1d3 S-M, 1d2 L, ROF 3/1 | range S/M/L 10/20/40 mod 0/-2/-5

Thief Skills

Pick Pockets 20%
Open Locks 80%
Find/Remove Traps 80%
Move Silently 75%
Hide in Shadows 65%
Detect Noise 30%
Climb Walls 45%
Read Languages -5%
No armor bonuses : PP+5%, MS+10%, HS+5%, CW+10%.
Fancy lockpicks : OL+5%


Weapon (Initial 4 + 1 fighter 3+1 from Purple+1 thief 4+1 fighter 6) : Two-handed sword, Two-Weapon Style Mastery (2 slots, main hand penalty to 0, off-hand -2, can use two weapons of same size), Two-handed sword specialization (+1 to attack rolls, +2 to damage rolls, extra attack per two rounds), Quickness (2 slots, DEX+0), one free

Nonweapon (Initial 3, int+2 + 1 fighter 3+2From Purple+1 thief 4,+1 fighter 6) : Jumping (+0, STR+0), Set Snares (+0, DEX-1), Rope Use (+0, DEX+0), Swimming (+0, STR+0), Moutaineering (+0, N/A), Guitar (+1, DEX-0), Dwarven (+0, INT+0), Appraising (+1, INT+1)

Racial Stuff

have a natural AC of 6;
receive a +2 bonus to their surprise rolls;
can track prey by scent 50% of the time;
are immune to maze spells;
receive +3 bonus to their morale scores (including saves vs. magical fear);
have 60' infravision;
take damage as large creatures.

Weapon proficiencies: flail, great axe (as halberd), oaken club.
Nonweapon proficiencies: Alertness, animal noise, blind-fighting, direction sense, drinking, eating, hunting, intimidation, natural fighting, religion, seamanship, tracking, wild fighting.

Other special talents

Hygiene rating : +21
Snip & Snop: A Children's Primer To Adventuring (1/day: gain advantage on a save, declare before the roll)
Life's A Beach : (Once per day heal self for 1d6 HP as a free action, even in combat.)


Money: 440 GP 0 SP 0 CP
+47GP equivalent in small coins
Item Weight
Two-handed sword x2 30
Dats x9 4.5
- -
Sandals -
Belt -
Good Cloth Cloak -
Backpack 2
Mirror, small metal -
Rope, 100ft, hemp 40
Thieves' Picks of +5%OL 3
Sword's scabbard x2 -
Grappling Hook 4
Piton x10 5
Torch x7 7
Flint and Steel -
Winter blanket 3
- -
Rations, standard 24 days 3
Salt 1
Wineskin x2 2
Bread 1
- -
Total 109.25

Purple Loot

Your character starts with a small wooden statuette of a duck apparently in the throes of some bizarre dance move. Either that or the artist just didn't know how ducks worked. Yes, it floats.
Aunotrag's pendant looks like a gem trapped inside a thicket of thorns.
One cheap guitar.
One fancy thieves' picks kit of +5% to open locks.
One gryphon eye. Screw you Purple I decide to keep one.
Wizard guild membership card. (Shows his name, picture, rank in the guild (apprentice), membership number (69420), address (currently none) and marital status.)
One fragile endless decanter of water
Bits of INVISIBILITY POWDER, throw it in a fire to create smoke that renders stuff invisible. -
Mysterious dwarven coat of arms with dwarven words behind.
An extremely gaudy-looking ring with a large emerald
A hat with a feather in it (worn)
Safety Mage Hat(Pointy), it has vivid hazard striping to make the wearer visible, a fold-down visor and a reinforced brim.
Safety Mage Boots(Pointy), with soles capable of resisting caltrops, caustic materials and broken bits of potion bottle.
Potion-Resistance Robe, for when you don't want to accidentally be affected by your own concoctions.
Safety Clipboard, doubles as a buckler or a mace due to the weight and durability.
Goggles of Eye Protection, they protect the eyes, unlike normal goggles which just make you look cool.
Among other things, like warning stickers and brightly coloured chalk for drawing warning lines with.
A vase with three flowers or something.


Sorcerer of Fortune #574 (banned in nine planes)

Levelling ?!

+1 NWP for being good little boys on session 1
+500 XP from whatever it was
+12 XP from spending gold
+500 XP from an increase or w/e
+2000 XP the ooze
+1000 XP jumping off a cliff onto a gryphon, riding it and cutting its head mid-flight, fuck yeah
+500 XP draining the swamp, fucking incel wizards
+500 XP knocking out a kid and stealing his blood
+500 XP for looting a kid's tent and pockets after stealing his blood and being adventurous with tea
+500 XP for NOT murdering a group of obvious evil pseudo-PCs, the worse of which is the fucking bard
+15 XP for enabling organized scams preying on the gullible
+10 XP for abusing the trust of the mentally challenged by which I mean the bouncer, not Purple
+1 NWP from lvl 4/3 W/T because if we don't track this holy shit it's going to get out of hand
+1 WP from lvl 4/3 W/T
+2500 crushing pixies and destroying a wizard's appartment building
+2000 XP getting blueballed and not killing some demon god thing living inside a sword
+1 WP the same
We're missing 2500 XP in the count there vs the game's main page lmao, good job genius.
+1000 XP for giving some meat to the chef and losing Fortuna and Moss
+2000 for wind lift thing make joke later it late
+3500 Purple took pity and let me level up
+5000 laying a dragon milf
+600 spent money on wizarding gear like an idiot
+100 magical ID of the vase
+5000 XP from grabbing a boulder to smash a lich
+1000 XP from Hank and Aunotrag throwing themselves down a mountainside
+5000 XP for penetrating a dragon's cloaca and overloading all her nerves and brain all at once
+20000 XP because Purple knocked up Hank
+a lot adjusted to 120K xp because this is endgame and we're going to slay/lay/play the Dark Majesty soon-ish.

120000 to 132000 with 10% bonus for being awesome, should be 20% but Purple is a little COWARD.

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