3rd Level
Morton's Confident Chaos
Arcane
Invocation/Evocation, Wild Magic
Range: Special
Components: V, S
Duration: Special
Casting Time: 5
Area of Effect: Special
Saving Throw: Special
4th Level
Morton's Masterful Mixer
Arcane
Alteration, Wild Magic
Range: Special
Components: V, S, M
Duration: Special
Casting Time: 1 turn
Area of Effect: Special
Saving Throw: Vs Polymorph
Cast upon two or more objects or living creatures, Morton's Mixer attempts to combine them into a functional whole. If either is alive, they must fail(or forfeit) a saving throw vs Polymorph. After that, the mage must roll below his level on a d20. If either subject succeeds at a save, the spell simply fails. If the mage fails his roll, the combination occurs but is… flawed, living things are either terribly crippled or expire rapidly, dead things are non-functional or extremely dangerous in unintended ways.
In either case, what's created is never entirely under the caster's control and if it's a living creature, it is not required to obey him. Usually it retains its general attitude towards the caster(hatred, friendship, servitude, etc.), though. The actual stats usually end up somewhat resemblant of an average of the two things combined, as far as is possible.
If the caster rolls more than 10 below his level on the check, he somehow ends up making two versions of the thing, and if they're alive, they're of opposite genders.
The material components are two platinum cages which must contain the subjects when the spell is cast, costs vary depending on the sizes of the cages in question.
Mordenkainen's Mysterious Monologue
Arcane
Abjuration
Range: Special
Components: V, S
Duration: 1 round/level
Casting Time: 1
Area of Effect: 1 room/area
Saving Throw: None
When cast, the caster may monologue for a number of minutes equal to his level, during which no one can act or interrupt him without his permission(except for shocked exclamations or protestations). Should anyone enter the scene from outside and interrupt, the effect is broken for everyone involved. The caster cannot attack any subjects included in the spell's area of effect, the moment he prepares to attack or cast a spell, the Monologue is broken and everyone may act freely, without surprise.
5th Level
Morton's Magnificent Multitude
Arcane
Invocation/Evocation, Wild Magic
Range: Special
Components: V, S
Duration: Special
Casting Time: 8
Area of Effect: Special
Saving Throw: Special
Morton's Magnificent Multitude is essentially an advanced version of Nahal's Reckless Dweomer, highly risky and the sort of thing that no mage in his right mind should really be casting. It allows the mage to emulate three spells from 1st to 3rd level(spells he must have in his spellbook, but not necessarily memorized), all of which trigger a Wild Surge. If the Wild Surge description includes the spell occurring like normal or with a modified effect, then the spell is cast and takes effect as per any modifications. If not, the Wild Surge occurs instead.
1st-level spells cast with Morton's Magnificent Multitude have a +25 to their Wild Surge roll(in addition to any modifiers from the caster's level, magical items or other effects), 2nd-level spells have a +15 and 3rd-level spells have a +5.
All spells and surge effects take effect at the same time, if certain spells or effects would cancel each other out, neither take effect. Or perhaps they cause some sort of terrible, chaotic interference that puts the entire fabric of magic and reality at risk.
Attempting to use this spell to cast Nahal's Reckless Dweomer or any similar spell has side-effects that are best left unexplored, but it's said that wild mages who are well and truly fucked have sometimes attempted it as a last resort. Usually they don't survive. Nor does the countryside.
Morton's Chaotic Creation
Arcane
Conjuration, Wild Magic
Range: Special
Components: V, S
Duration: Special
Casting Time: 8
Area of Effect: Special
Saving Throw: Special
